Roleplaying - Rogue Trader

For a while now I have been in a regular Friday night roleplaying group that plays Rogue Trader in the 40k warhammer universe.  At first I was worried about this, because I have never roleplayed outside of D&D and this one is set in the future - with space ships and lasers etc.

In actuality I love this game.  I think it has a lot to do with the DM, who changes things he doesn't like about the 40k universe, and he is one of the best descriptive talkers I have ever met.  So every time we have an action event, it becomes completely real because of his description.

In addition to the DM, the other players have also really gotten into a groove lately.  I have felt this before when I played with friends in England, and it is always awesome.  When every person is really into their character and you hardly have to leave character the whole night.  It usually means there are a lot of jokes and laughter - which is the best kind of roleplaying really.

Last night was big for me - which is why I am finally writing it out. My character (Brida) had to confront another character.  It was very scary. Action is fine, you just hit things and aim for the bad guy.  But character development has always been my weakness. Even with my group in England I felt for years that I didn't belong totally, but then finally became more comfortable with the people as well as characters.  It seems the same with this group in HK, I am finally comfortable enough with the people that my character can speak more freely.  I am no longer worried about judgement - which is liberating.

It is a little sad that I am just finally getting to this point as I am leaving. But I am determined to keep in touch with these guys via Skype - so all is not a waste.  Plus I will be able to take some tools I have learned from these crazy kids in HK to my group in England.  Like how awesome playing in the future can be.

All of this roleplaying and finally getting into character is making me think a lot of my friends in the UK.  About a year and half ago one of the players bought a game called Gloom.  At the time I really didn't want to play it.  It is mainly descriptive story telling game.  In the original Gloom you get a family and slowly by telling a story and using the cards in your hands you have to kill off every member of the family.  Each death and card gives you points, so in the end the total points wins.  There is an awesome Table Top (which is a show that tries out games) video on this, in case you want to see how it is played.  Now I am excited to go back and play it.  I just hope my friend doesn't mind my delay :-)

After last night our DM asked either me or the person I was confronting - Helga- to write out a detailed description of what happened.  This is what he (the person behind Helga) e-mailed this morning.  It was so hilarious and perfect I asked if I could put it here. Enjoy. Note before reading - the writer called this confrontation "Helga and Brida's civilized words in the most ladylike fashion" and you should know that Helga is having anger management issues recently in game.

Brida had been spying on her. On HER! Muttering curses and explicit phrases while quickly dressing, Helga Barbaretta was fuming. She looked at herself in the mirror for a moment, ice cold eyes staring back at her. The eyes of someone who had seen it all, and conquered it with brute force and a warm gun. Someone who had written her legend in blood and pain on countless ships and planets over the years. She could feel the muscles tensing under her military style clothing as she clenched her fists repeatedly. She turned and left the changing booth, leaving behind a shattered mirror and broken glass on the floor.

Brida had locked her quarters. Helga wasn't surprised. She was, however, surprised to find that Brida was actually there. Maybe she wasn't all that smart after all. She knocked.
'Who is it?'
'Open the door!'
'Why would I do that?'
'Open the door!'
'I'm not sure I want to do that!'
Helga grinded her teeth for a second, veins pulsating on her neck and forehead, before ripping into the door with her hands, pulling it from it's hinges, forcing it open with a terrible scraping sounds. As she was starting to make progress, Brida pressed it open on her wall console, causing Helga to stumble into the room. Regaining her balance, Helga immediately made her way across the room towards Brida, who was standing by the far wall, facing her. With all her might, Helga slammed Brida against the wall with her hand clenched around her neck, though not quite. Something was there, in between her palm and Brida's thin, vulnerable, weak neck.
'Why are you spying on me?' she yelled, lifting Brida from the floor, back still pressed against the wall.
'I wasn't!' Brida replied, struggling to free herself, before adding 'Ok, yes, I was. But I had my reasons to!'
'And what, pray tell, are those reasons?!' Helga spat the words in the psychers face.
'This would be SO much easier if you would calm down.'
'Why were you spying on me?'
'Why are you so angry? There's really no need for this aggres-'
'Last chance Brida. Why! Were! You! Spying! On! Me?'
'Is this about me seeing you naked?'
Brida immediately realized that wasn't the smartest thing she could have said, and it showed in her face, as well as Helgas, where a flash of even worse rage crossed it, before she grabbed a hold of Bridas collar and ripped her clothing into shreds with her free hand.
'I can see you naked any time I want, Brida!'
Brida struggled to keep herself covered with what was left of her robes, while at the same time clinging to Helgas arm to buy herself some leverage in order to not choke, despite the force field around her.
'Fair enough, but hear me out. Please.'
Helga moved closer to Brida, so that mere inches separated their faces.
'I think you're not quite yourself. I think something happened to change you.'
'What would that be? And how does that excuse you spying on me?'
'I believe that something happened to you when you were fighting that sorcerer! Something that changed you, somehow.'
Helga stared back at Brida, unflinching, waiting for her to continue. Brida swallowed, and continued.
'I... I first noticed just after I joined your crew. On that Eldar ship. When you cut that Eldar who attacked us in half!'
Helga narrowed her eyes, thinking back.
'Not that I'm complaining about the way you cut people in half, I love the way you cut people in half, I think it's great! Really!' (note from Brida - this was placating not serious)
Helga's knuckles started to ache from the pressure she was applying to whatever was shielding Brida from a well deserved snapped neck.
'It's just, well, it's just that I think something happened while you were fighting  that sorcerer on Footfall. Do you remember what happened that time?'
Helga forced the words out through her teeth.
'I remember everything!'
'So tell me. What happened that time? You got hit by something, didn't you?'
'He threw a knife at the captain, yes.'
'I believe it was a spell...'
'He threw a knife. At the captain.'
'And you took it for him, right?'
'He avoided it and it hit me.'
'And I think that spell, not knife, spell changed you.'
'And how would you know this?'
Helga's voice is like razorblades against soft, weak skin. 
'Because you're what... a psycher?'
Brida stares back at her in silence for a moment before speaking.
'That depends on whether you will kill me if I say yes or not.'
'I have no problem with you psychers.' The last word sounding full of malice.
'Good. I don't know for sure how their spells work, it's not like with us psychers. We make things happen and they go away, but I believe sorcerers effects will linger on. In your blood, like.'
Helga stares in silence.
'Now would you please put me down?'
With a guttural roar, Helga throws Brida across the room, on top of the bed, her head slightly bumping against the headboard, before proceeding to throw a chair after her. The chair smashes against the wall, showering the bed and Brida with debris. She punches into the door console, in an attempt to force the door shut. It stays open as the console sends sparks and tiny billows of smoke into the room.
'So you agree then, something changed that day?'
'I'm in control!'
'I'm sure you are, I never said anything to the contrary.'
'I'm stronger than it.'
'It?'
'I'm in control!'
'I'm glad to hear that, but aren't you curious about it?'
'Of course I'm fucking curious!'
'Don't you wonder what happened?'
'What does it matter? I'm stronger than ever, and I'm in control!'
'That's great, if you grow stronger and remain in control of this... whatever it is, that's amazing, really! But what if one day you can't control it, because you don't understand what it is?'
'Shut your mouth, you snotty little bitch! I'm in control!'
Helga smashes a table in half with her fists, before sending the wrecked halves flying across the room in opposite directions, trashing additional furniture and clothing.
'What if you lose control, and you hurt the captain?'
Helga freezes in her tracks for a moment, before turning towards Brida. She storms over to her, pointing her finger in her face while her voice booms out across the room.
'You dare? You dare to insinuate I would ever hurt the captain!? How fucking dare you? I would never hurt that man after all he's done for me! You... you little... fucking...!'
'But what if? Don't you think this man that you feel such loyalty to, who trusts you with his life, don't you think he should know about this?'
'You're telling me what to do? Who do you think you are?!'
Helga's face is a mask of rage, ready to explode into a rampage of epic proportions at any moment.
'I'm someone who's concerned about your well being. Can't you see I'm trying to help you here?'
'I DON'T NEED ANYONE'S HELP! I'm in control! I'm the strongest!'
Helgas fist smashes through a bookshelf, the contents of which tumble out all over the floor.
'But what if you DO end up hurting the captain? All that trust between you would mean nothing then.'
'I'M IN CONTROL!'
Helga punches the wall repeatedly while yelling, repeating the same sentence over and over, like a mantra.
'I'M IN CONTROL! I'M IN CONTROL! I'M IN CONTROL!'
As she glances around the room, seeing the broken furniture and clothing, her voice changes, followed by her facial expression. Finally she stops while staring at Brida in her torn clothing, sitting on the bed.
'I'M IN CONTROL! I'M in control! I'm.. in... control?'
Her eyes flicker around, unable to focus on any specific spot.
'No, no, no. I'm the strongest. I am. Me!'
She grabs her head, forcefully massaging her temples while sinking to her knees on the floor in front of Brida.
'No no no no no no. I'm the strongest. Helga Barbaretta. The strongest. Helga the Red. I am Helga Barbaretta. I am Helga Barbaretta. I am...'
Brida sits on the side of the bed, carefully patting Helga while biting her lip. She's obviously somewhat at a loss about what to do.

After a few moments of sobbing into her hands, Helga stands. She looks into Bridas eyes.
'So why were you spying on me in the shower then?'
'I wanted to see, you know, if you had any kind of mark or scar left where the spell hit you.'
'Why? What does it matter?'
'Like I said, aren't you curious? Don't you wonder about it?'
'Of course I do. Of course I have wondered what it is. What it means. I have never felt this strong, this... alive. But maybe, just maybe...'
Helga hesitates for a moment. Then she unbuttons her jacket and pulls down the shirt to reveal the mark on her chest to Brida.
'Is this what you wanted to see? Is it all clear to you now? Does it all snap into place?'
'Would you mind if I researched it?'
'The mark?'
'The mark, yes. Would you mind? So that we may know what it is?'
Helga covers the mark up again.
'Go ahead. Knock yourself out. But not a word about this. It stays between us for now.'
Helga looks around the room. Looks at Brida. She turns around and walks towards the door.
'I'll send someone to take care of this mess.'

She disappears out through the doorway, her boots echoing down the hallway. Anyone in the vicinity most likely legged it the moment Helga started ripping into the door.
Brida lets out a breath she didn't notice she had been holding and slumps a bit on the bed for a moment before she starts looking for some undamaged clothing. Someone is bound to show up very soon. Better be properly dressed when they do.